I don't have a bank account, because I don't know my mother's maiden name. - Paula Poundstone
I'll probably never have children because I don't believe in touching people for any reason. - Paula Poundstone
They say that the wages of sin is death. But after taxes its just a tired feeling really. - Paula Poundstone
The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling. - Paula Poundstone
The problem with cats is that they get the same exact look whether they see a moth or an ax-murderer. - Paula Poundstone